Tuesday, July 22, 2014

More Social - Less Network

“I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo.

"So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.” 

All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.  Isn't that the truth?  Lately, my life has become a non stop whirlwind of busy.  I have 2 kids, 2 jobs, a ministry and a home to run.  On top of all that I am trying to get into grad school so I've been doing a lot of studying for that.  I do not have much spare time - yet, I still have control over what I do with the time that I have.

Earlier in the year a sweet friend had mentioned that she is trying to not be on her phone unless the kids are sleeping and no one is around.  I have tried to follow her suit (some days I did better than others) and I realized how difficult it really is. 

Someone asked me a few days ago what my hobbies were. "Ain't nobody got time for that" was the first thing that popped in my head.  Yet this got me thinking what it is that I really enjoy doing, what it is that sets my heart ablaze... and whether there is ample time in my life for that.

See what I wanted to do is to identify my biggest time wasters and rid myself of those so I can make more room for the things I really enjoy.

Here's my list of the things that make me happy and the things that I enjoy doing or having:
*** spending time with God (when I do dedicate even a little focused time on a devotion or prayer, I feel significantly better)
*** spending time with my loved ones and friends (I am powered by human connection - my "love language" is quality time for sure)
*** eating healthy (yes, I do indeed enjoy it most of the time - and most of the times when I eat junk is because I have failed to prep a meal ahead)
*** blogging (I missed it but couldn't seem to find time for it)
*** keeping a simple home (I am naturally quite messy but a clean simple home brings peace to my soul so I want to purge my home of clutter and simplify our lifestyle)
*** enjoying nature and reading (oh how I miss both)

All of the above are the things that make me happy, content and willing to live life to the fullest.  I have not had time for those recently so I needed to identify where my time goes and find a solution.

As a result of my contemplation I have announced last week that I will be deactivating my Facebook account. 

Before I proceed - disclaimer - I know that Facebook helps many people stay connected and that it has been very helpful and encouraging to many people.  I get it.  The reasons why I will go off are my personal reasons and may not apply to everyone reading this so please don't you all get offended with me now.

I am choosing to deactivate because:

I believe Facebook is not what "keeping in touch" should be all about.  I want to remember your birthdays and not simply be reminded of it when I log in.  I want to ask you how your trip went and hear all about it with the excitement in your voice.  I want to learn how to ask questions and remember the details of your life.  I want to email you, text you, call you, write to you personally - so you know you're important to me.  On Facebook we throw things out there in hope that someone will notice.  Think about it - when your birthday comes around - which would you prefer: a Facebook message or a personal text?  or even better - a congratulation in person?  I want my children to learn to love other people and be good citizens of the world.  In order for them to learn that - I must set the example they can follow.  Do I want my children to remember me as constantly staring at the screen or as someone who was always present 100% in their lives?

But Facebook is not the only time waster in my life and there are definitely other things that need to happen so I can free up some time for the things I enjoy.  Here's my master plan to complete by Friday.
1. Try to get the contact info of some people to keep in touch while my social network life is down. 
2. Temporarily deactivate Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, VK, and possibly (I am still debating on this last one) Instagram.
3. Remove all those apps from my phone.
4. Remove all games (leaving a few kiddie ones just in case I need to create a diversion for my 3 year old). It all has to go - Angry Birds, Fruit Ninja, Frozen, Candy Crush, Mahjong - all has to go.

Here's what I will miss.
I will miss the updates of dear friends around the world who are surrendering their lives daily to better the lives of those around them.  I will miss their pictures and their posts. - Solution: I will subscribe to as many newsletters as I possibly can, I will follow their blogs if they write them, I will make an effort to keep in touch.

I am intending to stay network-free until the end of the year when I will come back and re-evaluate.  Simplifying life is a process of trial and error.  Some things will work.  Others won't.  But I am refuse to be weighed down by the expectations of the world around me and spend time on things that are not beneficial to myself or my family.  I want to enjoy life to the fullest.

So that's that... on Friday if you try to find me on Facebook I won't be there... but hopefully I'll blog more... hopefully I'll play with my kids more... hopefully I'll go out for coffee more... hopefully I'll pray more... hopefully I'll clean more...

I do want to hear from you.  What are your thoughts?

They say I'm old-fashioned, and live in the past, 
but sometimes I think progress progresses too fast!” 
― Dr. Seuss

1 comment:

Katia said...

It takes a lot of courage to do what you are doing Helen. I have to admit I do not have this courage at least at this very moment.. But I would love to do the same. Facebook is my biggest time waster and I often find myself staring at my iphone when my daughter is around. I will say more: Internet is my biggest time waster. I spend so much time looking for ideas, books to read, movies to see, places to go to, games to play with my daughter.. that ironically I have no time to actually do any of these things and I end up having long lists of stuff I never get around to doing. Well, at least I admit this.. and you have to start somewhere, right?

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...